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Hardheaded, lazy, sometimes crazy..or maybe a LOT of times..shy (really?) ... and uh..be nice to me and i'll be nice back..but insult my intelligence or backstab me..u'll just see what will happen..

Chaos???

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Have u ever heard of chaos? Chaos in malay means 'Huru-hara'. Actually, i dont know why im posting over this..but i just want to say , chaos is the right word rite now for my mind. Its so chaotic in here that i cant think right! How weird, yesterday, i went to all the usual places i always do but with different routes. If its shorter, it'll be fine..but its so fucking far and its like im making a round to get the places. Whoooo! Nevertherless, i got to where i wanted.

These past few days, i've been thinking, and thinking, am I able to be a good teacher? Will i be able to cope up with the students' behaviour? Can i manage to co-operate with the teachers? Will I? Can I? !!!!!!!!!!!!

The more i learn the subjects, the more im having trauma of going to school. Its called Paranoid. Period.

There are other things on my mind too, but i guess i just have to brush them off for a while..or forever. I dont want more n more greys on my head! Plus, my body is getting weaker , day by day, with every puffs i make. Damn those creators of cigarettes! It feels so hard to breathe..sometimes..and i get tired easily..am i dying? One thing i know, i must STOP. Sooner or later. I dont want to lose anyone anymore because of these. I lost my father and my uncle because of it. And yet, i repeated history of smoking. Oh please, my inner will, please, be tough!

CRAPS!

7 comments:

kHaiEysHa said...

msti stop smoke!
da janji dulu nak try~

Pais パイス said...

trying la ni.. T.T
siap bli buku 'Nak tak berhenti merokok?'

Sera said...

gud luck in trying to stop smoking.. u shud dowh.. everyone shud.. wat same2 la ngan org lain especially those close to u.. mcm housemates ke ape.. kalo gitu easier kot.. rasenye la..

Pais パイス said...

lol..dats kinda..impossible...dorang mcm tanak berenti ja...susah la

kHaiEysHa said...

btol ke bli buku tu?
wow.
sy da benti.kdg2 je.haha

Pais パイス said...

lol..thu bkn benti..thu orang kata kureng..

Sera said...

then brenti sama aizat.. (: