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Hardheaded, lazy, sometimes crazy..or maybe a LOT of times..shy (really?) ... and uh..be nice to me and i'll be nice back..but insult my intelligence or backstab me..u'll just see what will happen..

A joyful day!

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Today, 1st October 2008 , as well as 1st Syawal 1429.. is the day muslims celebrate their 1 month of fighting...by fasting. It supposed to be a joyful day for everyone...but i guess not me. I had few things that made me sad and not as joy as everyone else...but i'll try not to be sad. It has been days since i've been sad...and today my sadness add up when these things happened.....
Early in the morning....due to the excitedness last nite...i overslept and missed my morning Raya prayer...dang! Then...when i was eating i was asked to be a runner .... for ice and mee...whoo...nevermind that...due to my carelessness...i scratched my car after i bumped into the gate...!@#@!%!#^
Anyway...this is a picture i took just now with my new baju raya...expensive maa! first time in my life i spend so much on clothings for raya....i guess My Dark Age needs a change..i define year 2008 is my Dark Age (zaman gelap) as im a total ass in this year!

A date which i could never forget. Ever!

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

10/9/2004 8P.M

is the time when i got a call ... saying that ... my dad has passed away...i was silenced..paralyzed...by that statement...i couldnt help myself but be very very shocked and sad while i have to be strong and tell everyone (my mom, my brothers)...
Tears were rolling down my cheeks as i rang up my brothers one by one...
We went straight to Kelantan from Terengganu that night...

When we reached there he was already covered up with a blanket...i couldnt say anything...just sat next to him...and read him 'Surah Yasin'. God, eventhough im not very close to him...i could feel the loss when this happened. I never got the chance to be really close to him..as my parents were divorced when i was quite young...i suppose? I was like...3 months old to 1 year old..cant remember..but mom and all my brothers including me moved to Kuala Lumpur after that...mom raised us all by herself..thanks mom! I love you for being my angel in this world.

Back to the stories of my dad,... when i was young...he used to pick us up to stay with him for a week or so during school holidays..but whenever i went to Kelantan..i always cried...im not used to him..and i miss my mom...as a fact..im always the one who ruined everything...and my dad had to send me back home...the fastest was a day! Lol!

To think back..KL-Kelantan is quite far and yet...he drove all the way for us...thanks Dad for your effort! Eventhough i sometimes asked myself questions..why Dad left us? Why? Am I not good enough for him to have a reason to stay? Or am I the one who caused all these? Am I??????
Well i guess there's no point in saying anything more...but i now...can only pray hard for him...hopefully he'll get to a place called Heaven. Amin.

PS: To everyone who still have fathers and mothers...please..love them...they wont be around forever...and one more thing...dont depend too much on them...they are not immortals.

And one more thing...i got this in my email..very nice...im touched after i read this..(in Malay : terharu laa siot!)

Malaikat di rumahmu Suatu hari seorang bayi siap untuk
dilahirkan ke dunia.
Dia bertanya kepada Tuhan : "Para
malaikat disini mengatakan bahwa besok engkau akan
mengirimku ke dunia, tetapi bagaimana cara saya hidup
disana, saya begitu kecil dan lemah"?

Dan Tuhan menjawab, "Saya telah memilih satu malaikat
untukmu. Ia akan menjaga dan mengasihimu.
"

"Tapi disini, di dalam syurga, apa yang pernah saya
lakukan hanyalah bernyanyi dan tertawa.
Ini sudah
cukup bagi saya untuk berbahagia.
"

"Malaikatmu akan bernyanyi dan tersenyum untukmu
setiap hari.
Dan kamu akan merasakan kehangatan
cintanya dan menjadi lebih berbahagia.
"

"Dan bagaimana saya bisa mengerti saat orang-orang
berbicara kepadaku jika saya tidak mengerti bahasa
mereka ?"

"Malaikatmu akan berbicara kepadamu dengan bahasa yang
paling indah yang pernah kamu dengar; dan dengan penuh
kesabaran dan perhatian, dia akan mengajarkan
bagaimana cara kamu berbicara.
"

"Dan apa yang akan saya lakukan saat saya ingin
berbicara kepadaMu ?"

"Malaikatmu akan mengajarkan bagaimana cara kamu
berdoa.
"

"Saya mendengar bahwa di Bumi banyak orang jahat.

Siapa yang akan melindungi saya ?"

"Malaikatmu akan melindungimu, walaupun hal tersebut
mungkin dapat mengancam jiwanya.
"

"Tapi, saya pasti akan merasa sedih karena tidak
melihatMu lagi.
"

"Malaikatmu akan menceritakan padamu tentang Aku, dan
akan mengajarkan bagaimana agar kamu bisa kembali
kepadaKu, walaupun sesungguhnya Aku akan selalu berada
di sisimu.
"

Saat itu Syurga begitu tenangnya sehingga suara dari
Bumi dapat terdengar, dan sang anak bertanya perlahan,
"Tuhan, jika saya harus pergi sekarang, bisakah Kamu
memberitahuku nama malaikat tersebut ?

"Kamu akan memanggil malaikatmu, Ibu.
"

Ingatlah selalu kasih sayang ibu, berdoalah untuknya
dan cintailah dia sepanjang masa.

Ramadhan Al-Mubarak

Saturday, September 06, 2008

Its been a week since Ramadhan started and Thank GOD that i survived fasting without any cheating or whatsoever. Phew! xD
The time really moves fast....it was already a week of Ramadhan and September! W00t! I still remember i went out for Merdeka celebration...it felt like yesterday...wth....at this rate i'll be old (i already am :P) soon!

Anyways, Happy Ramadhan to all muslims and may God bless u all for your 'ibadah'.

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